Sitting opposite a fellow intern and hearing her yak on and on about how awesome her project is and how nice her infographics are and trying hard to put up a face that shows that I care.

I’m probably going to die in the real world because it usually shows on my face when I try to act like I care when.. I really don’t. I think – I used to have more empathy in me.

Been having fears that this is going to be my work life…..

and fears that I’m gonna feel like this for the rest of my life after graduation.

Was talking to B about how I’m beginning to feel miserable at work and worrying about if I would really get to do what I love. He told me that most people don’t get to do what they like and I replied with ‘No wonder people in Singapore are so miserable’. It’s true. I see glazed eyes and jaded faces on the mrt everyday. Barely even 2 months into my internship and I’m already feeling like one of them sigh. He told me that’s why we have to find other things in life to make us happy, but isn’t your job a HUGE part of your life? And even then, even if you’re doing sth you like, you’ll want to do it to your best but really, no one’s best is enough.

Dad asked me the other day if I would rather take a high paying job that I don’t like, or a low paying one that I really like. My answer was obvious.. I guess he thinks I’m gonna be poor and broke all my life. hahha.


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