♥_♥

Was listening to covers on youtube & I found gabobondoc. His guitar skills are amazing ahhhh wish I could play like that :( + He’s so quirky and I love the way he says hello at the start of all his videos!! He has so much swag when he plays & he rewrites the covers from different perspctives gosh haha cool or whattttt. Go watch his videos!!!

Other people with swag on the guitar:

^ ♥_♥ Gosh seriouslyyyyyyy he’s so gna win HAHA

On a sidenote, I really want to see Kina Grannis live….. Hope she comes this year :)

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Eighteen

It’s been a while since I last posted, and it’s mainly because I’ve been super swamped with all the school work/ commitments, even though it’s only been the first week. Nevertheless it’s been a great first official week of school, and I’m so thankful for everyone who has been part of it!! 6C13 is such a lovely class to be in, they really brighten up my school days :’)

Shall not recount the details of what I did every single day, because there’s a journal for that now hehe. Thank you everyone who spent this weekend with me, sometimes I really wonder what I did to deserve all of you. Dinner + human taboo with JY KH Soph Viv Tingyu & Roy on Friday, Sakae + surprise + box (hahaha) with the Bridesmaids, clarinet reunion dinner, and tyf with my family really made my birthday weekend so special. Feeling the love~ Even though I really appreciate the gifts from everyone, it’s the time spent together that I really appreciate, so thank you all, so much :) So many things to thank God for, but I shall save it for my QT journal~

Funny how being eighteen doesn’t feel so different after all, hmmmm

Oh & I forgot to mention: I’M GOING TO SEE WONGFUPRODUCTIONS (OMG) ON THE 28TH OF FEB HAHAHA sorry just had to announce that. I’m so annoying sometimes. Lololol

P.S. This post is really to push the depressing post down, so I won’t seem so depressed every time you guys visit this page. Haha HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR EVERYONE <3

Wish I were a little girl without the weight of the world

Once in awhile I act like a child to feel like a kid again
It gets like a prison in the body Im living in
Cause everyones watching and quick to start talking, Im losing my innocence
Wish I were a little girl without the weight of the world

It would be nice to start over again
Before we were men
I’d give, I’d bend, let’s play pretend

Remember the times we had soda for wine
And we got by on gratitude
The worst they could do to you was check your attitude
Yeah when fights were for fun, we had water in guns,
And a place we could call our own
How we lost hold of home I guess Ill never know

It would be nice to start over again
Before we were men
I’d give, I’d bend, let’s play pretend

And when its the end,
Our lives will make sense
Well love, well bend, let’s play pretend

Its not going to be long before were all gone with nothing to show for them
Stop taking lives, come on lets all grow up again

(Pretend – Lights)

This song describes exactly how I feel. I kind of feel like I’m being forced to grow up so suddenly, turning eighteen in two weeks, being the oldest in school, taking my A Levels this year. I’m so afraid of losing myself along the way, of drifting apart from people I care about. It’s only the first day of school but the environment/ teachers have given me so much to think about. Wow. I know I have to know what I want in order to work towards it, but why do I have to decide on what I want now? It seems like every one has a goal in mind, of where they want to go, and here I am feeling like I just want to stay in school and think about it until I’m 100% sure of what I want to do with my life.

I don’t want to regret anything about this year, and I don’t want to spend my year moping around about how stressful the A Levels are either. I don’t want to look back years down the road knowing I could have done more with my year.

Too many thoughts and emotions today :(

2011: Thank you for the amazing year :)

2011 has changed me in ways that I can’t even begin to describe, & I’m so thankful for everyone that contributed to my year, regardless if you’re still in my life or not. A new class, an awesome orientation, a new CCA, SYF, a new responsibility, Sydney, mugging dates, EOYs, Resonate, Sojourn, etc. God really put me out of my comfort zone this year, and I’m proud to say that I’m a changed person now, thank You for teaching me so many things :’) So glad that I’ve grown closer to some people this year, you guys have played such a huge part in my 2011 :) No matter what happened in the past year, I just really want to end this year with a heart full of gratitude and appreciation, so here goes –

God: For being my best friend, for always being there when I need you, for showing my the right way by your grace, for blessing me with all the angels around me. For letting me grow in You, for bringing my family to church, for letting me step out of my comfort zone. :)

My family!! (It got deleted somehow) My father for quitting smoking seriously, my mother for being my pillar of support, my brother for being my companion when I’m bored at home to sing songs with/ do nonsense with, for how I’m always comforted to come home to you guys, even when I’m having a bad day. Love you all even though you’ll never see this <3

Bridesmaids: As in the previous post, you guys mean soooo much to me and we’ve watched each other grow since we were 13 hahahaha shit I feel so old right now. Every single moment spent with you guys is nothing short of warmth and you guys feel just like family to me. It’s like I can talk to yall about anything for hours on end and not feel judged/ bored. You guys have seen/ experienced the most embarassing moments of my life leh srsly HAHAHA & you still accept me for who I am – the slow and fussy eater, the emotional wreck, the one who’s sooo easily stressed, the one who’s forever lost and asking for directions, the one who probably takes you guys for granted sometimes. No amount of words will sum up to what I have to thank you girls for :)

Ada: My best friend since Year 1, my very first friend in Dunman High. Our lives kind of went separate ways after year 2 but you have always been there to be a listening ear whenever I needed it and providing wise and logical advice, am so proud of how well you juggle everything on your plate and how you always make time for the people you love, love you loads babe!!! & yes pls get married soon LOLOLOL.

Geraldine: I love you for always being true to who you are and never comprimising on your values no matter what. You are always just so.. you :) & I know I get mad at you quite often HAHA but you know I don’t take it to heart and despite your cold exterior sometimes I know you’re just a ball of mush inside hehe.

Kayleigh: I’m so glad I got to know you better this year, and that we’ve grown closer!! Thank God for you babe, thank you for always giving the most apt advice just when I need it, and being always willing to listen to my incessant rants. You mean so much more to me than you know. Thank you for being so hilarious all the time so I can laugh at you HAHAHA. Ok kidding, I know I can be totally retarded around you and you won’t judge @ all :) I actually admire how determined you can be when you decide that you want to do something. & I love how independent you are!! You accept me for the awkward turtle I really am, and you’re forever encouraging me when it comes to ____ lololol. Love you so much dear!!

Sherly: Thanks for being such a joy to be around, & I can always feel the genuine care and concern that you give to other people. You’re such a busy girl, didn’t exactly get to hang out with you much other than touch trainings and occasional outings. Thanks for all the advice you’ve given me, for all your embarrassing moments tht make us laugh & for being undeniably you :) Take care of yourself girl, love you so much and catch up when you come back!!

Vivienne: Thanks for always being there for me as the slowest eater of everywhere. HAHA okay kidding lol thanks for not judging my horrible singing & thanks for making me feel like I can tell you everything. For all the bus interchange talks, for sharing a part of you with me that is so important to you. For all the fights and arguments that we’ve had that brought us closer. I can’t say I’ve been the best friend to you, but I hope I can be a better one this year :)

Weilin: I don’t even know where to start because I have too many things to thank you for :’) This year has just been a roller coaster for both of us, and I think you’re the person I rant to the most about everything. You probably don’t know this but from you I learnt patience, kindness and to not even give up despite the circumstances and how helpless I may feel. For the countless times that I broke down in front of you, you always knew what to do and left me to be on my own because you know that’s what I needed the most. You’re always encouraging me and supporting me no matter what I decide to do, and that really means so much to me. You’ve been such a significant part of my time in band/ school/ being a pig HAHA. & you know me so well I think you know me better than I know myself. You are soooo much more than what other people think you are! Can’t wait for you to get back from Korea hehe. Love you so much!!!

Xinxin: I think you’re the person I spent the least time with this year :( But I’m still so thankful for you dear, for always being the first to know/ ask what’s wrong, for being such a joy to be around, and for being so supportive and encouraging no matter what I do. You always manage to cheer me up somehow haha xinxin san go play lan!!!!! I love you for how auntie you are, how trustworthy you are and how I can tell you anything in confidence that you’ll keep it to yourself hehe. Catch up soon!!

Terence: So so thankful for you you probably don’t even know it. Thanks for opening up to me, trusting me and confiding in me & for letting me do the same. Glad that we’ve grown closer this year and thanks for always being there for me when I need you. You’re always willing to listen even though I might not always be willing to share, & I appreciate you more than you know! I love how you love food like me and won’t judge me on how much I eat (right??) hahaha. & you’re more than just my junior, you’re my best friend & confidante :) More in your christmas card!

Isabel: Hello my wifey hahaha. Thanks for going through SYF and Sydney with me and adding so much colour to my 2011 :) So much has happened & I know you’ll emerge a stronger person, and I’m really looking forward to spending more time with you this year!! Thanks for all the whatsapp convos, for all the encouragement with youknowwho (LOL) and providing just the best advice and for sharing so much about your life with me. Love you so much best friend + spouse. All the best for your papers this week, you can ace them!

Roy: We’ve really grown a lot since Year 1 & thank you for standing by me through these years. You’ve changed a lot (I think, or maybe I just got used to you hahaha) but either way I’ve learnt to appreciate you much more now, and even though you may not always know the right words to say, I know that deep down you always have good intentions and that’s the most important. You’re always supportive of whatever I do, and it’s nice to know that you’ll be there no matter what. Thanks roy :’)

Clarinets: You guys inspire me in ways that you all are probably unaware of. Seeing how the juniors work so hard for SYF just made my heart swell with pride for you guys. I know that you guys cried a lot after the results, but yall will always be champions in my heart. (HAHAHA SO MUSHY can’t believe I’m saying this but it’s trueeee) & I can tell that the bond that you guys formed through this journey is really strong, hope that you guys will keep it this way even after the end of  your band journey :) Cheryl, all the best in Australia & see you when you come back to visit!! Thanks for being such a joy to be around and for making Sydney so enjoyable hehe miss you already!!

Chingwoon, Zoe and Kristal: You guys are the best seniors that I could ever ask for. Thank you for your tireless dedication to the band, I probably won’t be who I am today if not for you guys. I love how SP/ band/ part lunches and outings with yall are always enjoyable, and you always show so much care and concern to us juniors. You guys are more than just seniors to me and you’ll always have a special place in my heart, stupiakssss hahaha. I just know yall will go far in life & continue to inspire me!! Love you all!! :)

Year 5 squad: I may not say it very often but you guys mean sooo much to me. We’ve been through 5 years and 2 SYFs together and we all chose to stay together as a squad. You guys are so quirky & cute in your own ways and I wouldn’t ask for a better squad. Love you all so much, each and every one of you!!! Will include more specific stuff in your belated sojourn cards hehehe.

YJCEA1b: Thank God I met you guys this year – you guys have taught me so many life lessons I’m just so inspired by your lives & the things that you guys do in faith. Thank you so much for loving me for who I am!! And even though I don’t go to the same church as you guys anymore, I hope I still can share life with you guys when I get the chance to..

Nicholas: For awesome mugging sessions & for underestimating me just so I can get free drinks lolol. Thanks for being so easy to talk to and for sharing with me so much about yourself and trusting me with your problems. Even though I think you’re quite mean sometimes (hahahaha) you’re actually a really good friend and thank God I got to know you better this year. See you around!

Gerald, Xin Tian, Jiamei, Amandas, Sophin: You guys made it to the top of my “Most Missed” list of 2011, definitely..  Hardly got a chance to spend proper time with you guys, but when I did I really enjoyed myself!! Time spent with yall is always time well spent, and we have got to catch up soon!! Looking forward to seeing all of you soon :)

Touch Rug girls: Thanks for the awesome first half of the year, filled with trainings and friendlies and whatnot!! Omgosh we’ll have juniors next year what the heck hahaha we need more trainings. Thanks for letting me know how being in a sports team is like and for making trainings so so enjoyable! Miss you girls haha.

To all the people I’ve met this year + to all the friends who stood by me tolerating my nonsense: Wishing you guys a very happy new year & may 2012 bring you new hope and experiences that change you for the better :)