There’s a fire starting in my heart

Holy discontentment. What do I feel strongly about?

I realise how eager I am to be someone else’s listening ear and to encourage them, yet to afraid to face up to my own problems.
I procrastinate everything, even sorting out my own thinking and I hate this because it’s escapism and it’ll only lead to a vicious cycle.
Sometimes I wonder why I take so long to open up to people?
A lot of things in my life are so hazy now. I want it to be crystal clear and for that to be possible I have to do sth about it.
Ugh I’m not really making sense am I.

On the brightside, thank God for friends I can really pour my heart out to. I guess it’s because I open up to so little people only that it’s these few that I really really cherish :’)

On a more superficial note, I need to lose some serious fats, not weight, fats. It’s getting out of hand and I’m going to hong kong next week where everyone would be so skinny and fat me will not feel like shopping for nice clothes cos when you’re skinny everything looks good on you srsly. Must. lose. weight.

P.S. Unsure about this future but committing everything to You Lord.
P.P.S. I’m a socially awkward turtle.

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